This just in: Sony claims PS3 has “bigger genitalia” than Xbox 360. Microsoft rebuts, “Ours is thicker and therefore more enjoyable.” Industry insiders anticipate unzipping of pants and measurement thereof behind closed doors post-E3.

And in some dark corner, Nintendo offers a press release claiming that size doesn’t matter, because technique and experience are more important… and is roundly ignored by legions of teenage boys everywhere.